Well, even if we are excited, we know one person who isn't. Our Beloved Jerry. He's not into fancy phones. He told Conan about it and was hilarious, as always.
Stand-up comedian Judy Gold is an expert on Jewish mothers. She literally wrote the the book on them.
She may have gotten some flack in the past for promoting Jewish stereotypes, but she proves that her comedy comes from a very real, personal place in this classic Comedy Central clip. Like Wendy Spiro, Judy involves her acutal mother in her set, but this time Mom isn't telling jokes. Judy's mom is dead serious. And seriously hilarious.
New York-based comedian Gil Ozeri must not own a kosher phone card. Though he does stand-up, sketch and improv, Gil is oft known on the web for his phone sex pranks. He calls in, hits record, asks for something weird, and lets the hilarity ensue.
You really need a phone card, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. You're Jewish, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. Your Rabbi wants you to use less technology on the Sabbath, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. Have no fear! The Kosher Phone Card is here! Soon enough, talkative Jerusalem residents will be able to purchase a lovely calling card, adorned with a chamsa or a picture of the Wailing Wall, that will stop them from any naughty phone usage. Numbers deemed "undesirable" by the Rabbinical Committee for Communications will be impossible to call using your Kosher card. Try making any call on the Sabbath, wether its a booty call or a Bubbe call, and you'll be charged a hefty fee. This is all in the name of decreasing temptation for phone users. Less whore-a, more Torah.
In honor of this latest and greatest Jewish Invention, we bring you the best reason not to buy the kosher phone card. If you used one, you couldn't call this sexy Jewish hotline. Brought to you by the Shushan Channel.