Stews For The Jews: Top 5 Cholent Videos

When it comes to Jewish food, we're big fans. From matzah to deli delights, we're totally on board. But recently we've been exploring a new kind of kosher food: cholent.

Honestly, we hadn't really heard of cholent growing up, but apparently, it's as common as bagels in some Jewish communities. Hey, Wikepidia, what's the scoop on the Jew stew?

Well, now that we know more about it, we see it EVERYWHERE! Since we've got cholent on the brains (or for brains, depending on who you ask), we'll give you our

TOP 5 CHOLENT VIDEOS!

Cholent (Yiddish: טשאָלנט, tsholnt or tshoolnt) or hamin (Hebrew: חמין‎; also chamin) is a traditional Jewish stew simmered overnight, for 12 hours or more, and eaten for lunch on the Sabbath. Cholent was developed over the centuries to conform with Jewish religious laws that prohibit cooking on the Sabbath. The pot is brought to boil on Friday before candlelighting, and kept on a blech or hotplate, or placed in a slow oven or electric slow cooker until the following day.

5. Kids Choir Cholent Song
We love the use of "cholent" as do-wop back up vocals. Plus they are adorable!Videos a tad long, but the cholent part is right at the very beginning!



4. Jake's Cholent Promo
This guy is trying to be funny, but also is accidentally funny. Best combo possible.



3. High School Musical Cholent
HSM meets cholent. Need we say more?



2. Because I Got Cholent
To the tune of "Because I Got High". Some of those pictures of cholent would require us getting high to look appetizing.



1. Yakov Makes Cholent
Totally adorable kid makes totally gross-looking cholent. With a giant, scary knife.

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Ring Pop Goes Kosher

Kosher kids rejoice ! Now everyone can enjoy the awkwardness of sucking candy off of your finger! Rabbis of the Orthodox Union have officially certified ring pops as kosher. Production of the new and approved Ring Pop, with brand new packaging bearing the OU symbol, begins this month with the candy shipping to retailers nationwide in August.

Ari Weinstock, Director of Marketing at Bazooka Candy Brands, said,

“Working with the Orthodox Union, the top organization for kosher certification in the world, we can now bring Ring Pop to an entirely new, and discerning, consumer base that has never before been able to enjoy our products.”

Really? If they are such a "discerning consumer base," do you think their first choice would be slobbering on their hand?

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Forget Google. Forget Jewgle. Try Koogle.

We've covered kosher food, kosher drinks, and even kosher phone cards. Now we bring you the kosher search engine.

Wait, didn't we already post about Jewgle? Yep. But there's another one! And this time, they're super serious about it.

Koogle, named after the delicious kosher noodle treat, allows Orthodox Jews to surf the web, while avoiding sexually explicit material that devout Jews are barred from viewing.

Yossi Altman, Koogle's site manager, says "Nothing can be posted on the Jewish Sabbath, when religious law bans all types of work and business. If you try to buy something on the Sabbath, it gets stuck and won't let you."

Koogle's links to Israeli news and shopping sites also filter out items most ultra-Orthodox Israelis are forbidden by rabbis to have in their homes, such a television sets.

"The site omits religiously objectionable material, such as most photographs of women which Orthodox rabbis view as immodest," Altman said.

Most photographs of women? Oy Vey.

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Happy Anniversary, Bubbe ... Now Feed Us!

Happy Anniversary to Producer Avrom Honig, , and Bayla “Bubbe” Sher, star of Feed Me Bubbe, one of the web's most beloved and most delicious cooking shows.

Three years ago, Honig was looking for something different for his demo real, and thought maybe a podast would be a good way to go about it. With his father's encouragement, Honig recruited his 80-something-year-old grandmother to star in her very own cooking show. The podcast went viral, and the rest is adorable, kosher history.

According to their website, each episode contains:

1. An easy to understand recipe.

2. A Yiddish Word of the Day.

3. The feeling of going to your grandmother's.

Now Bubbe's got her sights set on fame beyond the web. She wants Jimmy Fallon's attention. She wonders if she should make her Jelly Jammies for him.





Once you've seen all the episodes, go buy yourself a Feed Me Bubbe t-shirt, or download a Bubbe ringtone.

Feed Me Bubbe episodes are also close-captioned for the hearing-impaired at ProjectReadOn.com.

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Alec Baldwin Reveals His Jewishness

Ever wanted to hear Alec Baldwin use a ton of Yiddish? Just ask him about legendary Jewish deli, Barney Greengrass!

Turns out the 30 Rock star is nuts for hameshe food, and hameshe folks. A real connoisseur. He even talks a bit about growing up with honorary meschpucha, and a young star-crossed love with a Jewish girl.

If you listen carefully, you can hear Baldwin say that his favorite Jewish holiday is Tisha B'Av! Hilarious.

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Top 10 Pork Products That Make Us Want To Keep Kosher

Hello Farkers! Thanks for checking us out. If you like what you see, you might want to become a fan of Jews on Facebook and see some of our other most popular posts including the Top 10 Jewish Super Heroes and the Top 5 Animals That Look Like Your Jewish Relatives.

Warning: Those with weak stomachs, or a predisposition to loving bacon may have difficulty handling the following post.

We all know (or have heard all our lives) that bacon is "delicious". We feel like the whole world is often singing this song:

So today, to combat the rumors of deliciousness, we present to you some inspiration.

THE TOP 10 PORK PRODUCTS THAT MAKE US WANT TO KEEP KOSHER


10 . The Bacon Bra
We like boobs as much as the next guy, but raw bacon boobs? No, thank you.

9. Happy Meat
This photo is the inspiration for this whole list. When creepy clown meets (meats) creepy pork in this nightmare deli case, we're ready to go full blown kosher.


8. Bacon Lube
In this video, an adorable intern takes the risk of ingesting a mouthful of a new product: bacon flavored lube. His reaction says it all.




7. Bacon Floss
Wy go with minty fresh breath when you can have a meaty, salty mouth? There are about a thousand things wrong with this picture.


6. Tons of stuff on This Is Why You're Fat
Scroll through this brilliant blog and you'll see photo after photo of treif food porn. Just looking at it has the same effect as when our dads punished us by making us smoke that whole pack of cigarettes in one sitting. Too much. Never again.


5. K-Mart Bacon = All Fat
Gross. Gross. Gross. Kind of awesome, but still mostly gross. (TheConsumerist)


4. Raw Pork Experiments
We had never heard of this urban legend. Apparently, they say that if you pour coke on raw pork, maggots appear. Well, hearing about it is enough to make your stomach churn, but that's not enough! Here's some video footage!

You'll Never Eat Pork Again... - More amazing videos are a click away

3. Raw Pork Experiments Reaction Videos

IMPORTANT UPDATE: Raw Pork And Coke Video - Funny videos are here


2. Bacon Pig
It is super treif. It is freaky. It is fattening. It is postmodern. (TheWarehouse)



1. Baby Pigs
Enough of this ridiculous trying to make our readers barf nonsense! Here's the funniest way to keep yourself kosher, no matter how delicious bacon is! This piglets are adorable, hilarious, and they hate Amy Winehouse. Awwwwwww.

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Freaky Pork And Other Friday Links

Clown Meat = Bad Dreams (FoundSh*t)

Amazing. Charlie Chaplin, The Great Dictator (iKlipz)

If Oprah Died... (Atom)

SouthPark on Scientology (iKlipz)

Milf Serenades Guinea Pig (HeyLookAnimals)

Cougar Sport SUV (Atom)

Again, We Hate Clown Meat, but We Heart Delis (TheLaughTrack)

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New Yorkers Get Gas From Kosher Deli

Those who go to this kosher Deli in Brooklyn are very likely to get some gas. For real. That's because this Deli is also the Rio gas station!

The Rio gas station in Borough Park, Brooklyn is also home to a veyr popular Kosher deli.

New York Fox 5's "Anne About Town" checks out the unusual deli location and learns a little about hameshe kosher food. She and her fellow reporters seem fascinated and intrigued by it all, even though they (presumably) live in New York and none of it should come as any sort of surprise.

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Mamma Mia! Top 5 Videos Our Moms Have Been Asking Us Us To Post

Almost every single day we here at I Heart Jews get some sort of e-mail from our moms with leads for posts. So far, we have not used a single one. And of course, we're feeling a little guilty.

Inspired buy Wendy Spiro's stand-up with her mother, we've decided to let Mom in on the comedy action, in honor of Mother's Day.

We're finally listening to our Moms' advice. Here's some of our favorites of her favorites.


5. YIDDISH "ABBA"
"You know I loved Mamma Mia. Well, now I love it even more! Who knew Abba could work with Yiddish?! They are so blond! You should put this on the blog. I love you. Call me later. xoxo Mom"

Mom-- I can't for the life of us figure out what is going on in this video. Is it a video for the song? For the Fashion show? Do they have anything to do with one another? I'll call you later tonight.



4. JEWISH BREAKDANCING
"You keep telling me that the blog is for comedy videos, but this one is really amazing. It has Jewish people breakdancing! Maybe you can make an exception to the comedy rule? The song is so catchy! Also, your facebook status said you were depressed. Are you ok? Kisses, Mom"

Hi Mom! I'm totally fine. Don't worry. I was just upset because Gossip Girl was a rerun. Thanks for the breakdancing video. It definitely has some comedy elements to it!


3. JEWISH JUGGLING
Good Morning, Sweetheart! Your Uncle Barry sent this to me, and I just had to get it to you right away! So funny! Plus, he is honoring mothers and he talks like that fast talking man on the car commercials that you loved as a kid. Love you! - Mom

First of all, I can't believe you remember Micro Machines, Mom! Second of all, that video was insane. Thanks! Love you too!


2. MARRYING MOM
This is so cute! But not as cute as you! Put it on the website. He says "Bubbe". Love, your mom

Thanks, Mom. That was disturbing.


1.KOSHER FOOD SONG
"Shaina Punnim- I know I already sent this to you, but I didn't hear back, so I'm sending it again. Your father and I really think you should put it on your Internet. It is very funny, especially if you are Jewish. E-mail or call us back to let us know that you got it. Did you ever go out again with that cute Jewish guy? Maybe he would like this video. - Ma"

Ma- On second viewing, that song is pretty darn catchy! I'm going to find a place for it on the website. I did go out with Jeffrey again, but I don't know if we're at the point in our relationship where I can start showing him kosher food internet videos.

Intro Photo Courtesy (Meshugalove)

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Baruch Atah Ay Dios Mio! Kosher Tequila Para Cinco De Mayo!

That's right! Kosher tequila!

We actually weren't aware that tequila, made from an agave plant (parev), was specifically non-kosher, but New York businessman Martin Silver did, and I rectified the problem with Agave 99.

Silver's company is producing half million cases of the 99-proof kosher tequila at a Mexican plant using methods certified by a rabbi. It will retail for the fancypants price of $41.95 a bottle.



Silver, president of Long Island-based Star Industries, says he wants to satisfy the craze for high-end tequila with one that observant Jews can drink — "to help the Mexican economy and the Jews." Help the Jews with what? Help the Jews have more one-night stands? Throw up in more public places? Create more regrettable sexy dance moves on the bar at Señor Frogs? Help Jews wake up the next morning only to discover that they've bought a $400 sword on EBay? Not like that's happened to us...

But we digress — the official product launch — with Mexican songs sung in Yiddish and Spanish — is set for today, Cinco De Mayo, but has been selling since before Passover, because Elijah loves doing body shots.

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Martha Stewart Goys It Up In The Wonderful World of Matzah

To some she may be the Ice Queen Shiksa, but her clear passion for Jewish culture is palpable in this video. Martha Stewart talking about matzah gives us the same sense of glee as Woody Allen saying "Dynamite ham".

Did you know that the word "matzo" comes from the word "matzah"? Thank you for clearing that up, Martha.

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Kosher Phone Cards and Sexy Jewish Hotlines

You really need a phone card, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. You're Jewish, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. Your Rabbi wants you to use less technology on the Sabbath, but you're worried about your compulsive addiction to phone sex lines. Have no fear! The Kosher Phone Card is here!

Soon enough, talkative Jerusalem residents will be able to purchase a lovely calling card, adorned with a chamsa or a picture of the Wailing Wall, that will stop them from any naughty phone usage. Numbers deemed "undesirable" by the Rabbinical Committee for Communications will be impossible to call using your Kosher card. Try making any call on the Sabbath, wether its a booty call or a Bubbe call, and you'll be charged a hefty fee. This is all in the name of decreasing temptation for phone users. Less whore-a, more Torah.

In honor of this latest and greatest Jewish Invention, we bring you the best reason not to buy the kosher phone card. If you used one, you couldn't call this sexy Jewish hotline. Brought to you by the Shushan Channel.

Thanks to Vos Iz Neias? for the lead!

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Israeli Government Officials - Avid Readers Of "I Heart Jews"

Clearly, Israel's deputy health minister, Yakov Litzman, has been keeping up with I Heart Jews! Obviously, he read our post yesterday regarding his awesomely ridiculous decision to re-name "swine flu" as "Mexican flu". He must have really felt burned by our clever blogging, because he changed his mind today!

"Israel has no intention of giving the flu any new names. It was nothing more than a slip of the tongue," the official said.*

We here at I Heart Jews are very proud of the difference we can make with a simple post.

Litzman continued, "Thanks to the delightfully irreverent blogging over at I Heart Jews, I have realized that changing the name of "swine flu" is totally ludicrous. Also, re-naming it "Mexican flu" is pretty offensive. I sure wouldn't like someone to name a disease "Jew Flu", though I do like rhyming. A hearty todah rabah and my deepest grattude to I Heart Jews." **

(AFP via GoogleNews)


* This quote is totally real.
** This quote is totally made up.

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Swine Flu Is So Totally Not Kosher

We are aware that swine flu is serious. We are also aware that though this news item is not a joke, it is hilarious.

JERUSALEM - Swine flu? Not in the Jewish state.

"We will call it Mexico flu. We won't call it swine flu," Deputy Health Minister Yakov Litzman, a black-garbed Orthodox Jew, told a news conference Monday, assuring the Israeli public that authorities were prepared to handle any cases.

Under Jewish dietary laws, pigs are considered unclean and pork is forbidden food -- although the non-kosher meat is available in some stores in Israel.

(Reuters)

Wait- we're confused. Doesn't "Mexiacan Flu" sound far away and less of an immediate threat? Wouldn't leaving "swine" in the title keep it scary? Wouldn't "swine flu" help keep Israelis away from both pigs and germs? It isn't like they named the disease "delicious bacon flu".

mmmm... bacon flu...

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